Regarding Lullabies

Remember a previous post where I said "the last picture I will take of Lily being 5 years old"? The truth is, I snuck into her room after she was asleep to take a few more.

Its terrible.

I know.

Stalker-ish.

I agree.

But if you were me, you would do it too.

If you were the mother of a busy 6- year- old- teenage- ball- of- energy,

you too, would delight in the innocence of 5-6ish year old silence.

Last night I sent her to bed early due to my frustration with her behavior.

She wailed and cried for someone to come sing her lullaby.

Eventually, I did.

I do not know if I am doing things right.

I do not

I question my decisions and my ever changing philosophies all the time with this parenting business

(long go the days when I was twenty-ish and knew everything)

The following night Lily says to me:

"Mom, I like for you and Dad to sing my lullaby because it makes me calm and sleepy. And if I have a bad dream, I just remember my lullaby and I feel safe. And in my day if anything goes wrong, I just know you are singing to me and I sing to myself. And then I remember."

And I think to myself...I have birthed a great philosopher.

And I think to myself I forgive both her behavior and my reaction the night before.

Lily's Lullaby: Sing to the tune of You are My Sunshine You are my Lily

my little little Lily

I love you so much

ev-ery-day

you'll never know, Bean How much I love you but its more than I can say"